R.John's REposted Movie Reviews

SITTING TARGET

Ian McShane pulls off the pretty boy psychopath as well as Oliver Reed pulls off the lonely white hunter. Professionals. Some great moments of the 70s in this piece:

- Harry killed a postman?

- People just do not foam at the mouth as much as they used to, do they?

- some use in kicking a dead dog

- 40.41 violence against pornos

- english motorcycles explodes

- violence against all of british ladies' unmentionables

- day/night/day again is pretty priceless

Women. Damnit.

DEADLOCK

Germans do spaghetti? Hard boiled sauerkraut.

Charlie Dump was stuck in the middle of the shithole with two hypersexualized sun baked ice queens. the winter winds never blew so cold and crazy. Though, the desert wild hair nymphette holds some mythic power which automatically makes me believe I would have been born a girl just to get mowed down holding my good shoes. Tragic.

The Kid should have died, or at least been unable to start the car at the end. I wish I looked that good in an bullet torn suit.

STONE

Things I learned from this movie

- Sidecars make great hearses.

- Satanic Funerals are really lame, tho, somewhat loud.

- Pros use crossbows. A what?!! A CROSS BEW!

- Scene around the pinball machine with the arrow bolt sticking up at 28 minutes in is priceless.

- "Being a criminal means being against pigs, and that means strict one jacket one vote democracy. you dig, pig?"

- Satanic Ear piercing and wardrobe ceremonies are really lame too.

- why wouldn't david letterman give toad a kiss?

- Conspiracies can only happen in semi-dark rooms and in large lapel suits.

- WHAT IS THE LAW!?!

- "Its particular, but when you have been conditioned into believing something and you blow it - i mean you really blow it - you get this incredible sense of shame, its funny, because you can always recognize fellow travelers. And when you ride bikes, man, I mean when you REALLY ride bikes, I suppose its inevitable." - Dr. Death.

- awww. toady was frightened of gettin a kickin.

- I thought the movie should have ended with the Dr. Death's bloodspit on the angel, but then I am a satanist.

5 DOLLS FOR AN AUGUST MOON

What the hell happened in this one?

A total BAVA mess.

- Tho, Isabel the Island girl is a passable wild haired brute.

- The plastic wrapped corpses strung up in the meat closet was a nice touch. Especially with children's taunting leitmotif barging in.

- But the triple cross is just absurd, and gone are the baths of color and matte work. Lotsa day for night and a few cool fisheye lens, tho, which is always a bonus.

DANGER: DIABOLIK

JPL is amazing ball of eyebrow energy in this one.

Diabolik's hideaway is a silly cavern of impossiblibity. Spinning beds are the way to a woman's heart.

Somewhat awesome effects driven caper movie that has very little setup and all heist. Tho, the style is wonderful and the visuals amazing. Plus Marisa Mell!!

KNIVES OF THE AVENGER

- trust the crazy old lady near the fire gyser who just sleeps on the beach when she is not doling out death fantasies to dethroned viking royalty, those ladies, they speak for the dead!

- eyebrows.

- it helps to have a hut or barn or other place to hide/live in which is totally conspicious to your enemies and everyone looking for you

- curly curly blonde hair

- eyebrows

- flashbacks are the only way to catch up on the story so far, there has been a lot of plundering and butchering, its like some former soviet satellite

- fistfights are a good way to reconnect

- when you go revenging, it helps to have an endless supply of trowing knives and daggers and short swords

- glistening thighs in leather shorts, plucked arched eyebrows, and creepy old guy/young boy bonding is really the whole attraction of these movies, huh?

Bava at his genre pinnacle. This movie drips scenery and sunbright dirt shimmering up under snow white stallions. The cave chase that involves a sleeping enemy is great stuff.

dennis hopper's LAST MOVIE

- hopper loves processions, they must symbolize the artifice of his immersion style of film-making

- great scene as he moves through the rooms of music, by 1971 the hippie dippy sing-a-long must have worn thin, noisy, and lame - much like the cocktail party, piano parlor parties of the bougie squares that preceded the hipps.

- so the Peruvians are idiots, satanists, and made the reality pretend and the pretend reality! And Milian is miscast as the benevolent priest, he should have been the fake director

- Filthy Americans always looking to make girls kiss.

- "This place is such a mess. Harry kills everything. And he never throws anything away." - Mrs. Anderson

- holy shit. Hopper might have made the best counter cultural film ever. Or a total waste of fucking time. Which would make it the best counter cultural film of all time. The paradox is imploding.

PRIVILEDGE

- Hysterical, sulking spoiled, pouting, lip biting, pillow grabbing, over-acting.

- 5 foot 11 in uplift boots.

- Largest national apple glut in British history. 6 apples a day for the whole of the summer.

- proto-emo handcuff theatrics

- Jeremy Child's Martin Crossley is a mix between George Martin and Grand Moff Tarkin

- putting the pop back into propaganda

Swinging fists at the money of nationalism, planned celebrity and media frenzied fame, this movie models the meta-blank self-awareness that would transform into winking privilege, itself. The Jean Shrimpton role is infused with the knuckle-dragging redemption/damnation qualities of the emerging woman archetype, a hold over foam within the wave of social commentary. Someone needs to break through the gauze, to expose the wounds on the back.

Fine.

THE SCALP HUNTERS

Not much comedy, except the whiskey fueled mud fight, in this western. The story of some pelts and the idiots who fought over them. Great avalanche scene. Salavas eats the west in his long johns. Ossie Davis hands in a fine performance a recasting of the nameless stranger motif in the Spaghetti Westerns - in this case he is playing both sides against his freedom, instead of a fistful of gold. Nice.

Carpenter's ASSAULT ON PRECINCT 13

this is a great horror film.

The fact that the gang members are totally silent really adds to the tension. Plus the unresolved ending is brilliant.

Of course the exploding paper and violence against windowpanes is also fucking classic. The first wave assault where they are getting blasted out of the windows is hilarious, I began to wonder in that scene what Carpenter had against those metal type shade things. They take a beating real bad in this one.

Not to mention the tight sweaters showing off the banana boobs of the goblin faced fatale.

So. Good.

HELLBOY II : The Golden Army

The movie was really quite good, despite the fact that it was once again all about the power of love.

AND I hate the love.

Especially, redemptive-breath-of-life sort of love.

Despite the fact that Mignola's influence is shoved to the sidelines over the Post-Pan's del Toro untouchableness.

Despite the Melnibone-ian influence on the ELF royalty.

Despite the lack of Lobster Johnson!

Despite the inclusion of that bag of dicks eating Seth MacFarlane.

Despite the fact that John Hurt is only in the first few minutes. But what an unfuckwithable exposition!

I really enjoyed it despite the fact that it was one of those "whisper westerns."

But Ray Winstone is a barrel of authority and colonial arrogance. And Danny Huston channels Hugh Keays-Byrne at his most broodingly ominous.

But being written by Nick Cave we have to suffer through such stingy dialogue as "Love. Love is the key. Love and family. For what are night and day, the sun, the moon, the stars without love, and those you love around you? What could be more hollow than to die alone, unloved?"

Ick.

Castellari's ANY GUN CAN PLAY aka Vado... l'ammazzo e torno

Contrived, meandering, tale of double triple quadruple cross shell game as three unlikely friends search for some stolen gold. While the story holds up, for the most, the uneven pacing and constant convolutions become silly.

The bandit, banker and bounty killer all seem hellbent on embodying the worst tropes of each - Monetero is all neckerchiefs and big hats, Clayton is all game show host hair and bouncing cowboy, while George Hilton's Stranger is an unshaven smudge.

The movie loves these boys and to that end there are some pretty homoerotic fight scenes. I mean I realize that there is an ongoing motif in which two men learn respect and trust through the exhaustive power of punches, but this bit in the river is too much.

Plus the bath house fight scene, which I suppose was meant to be an interlude of slapstick light-heartedness came damn close to being just straight to video hot man on man action!

Still Castellari manages to sneak in some sly camera angles, playing with mirrors and other reflective surfaces, as well as framing some interesting shots at gun or fist view. Probably the best sleight of hand comes at the standoff at the end that turns into pornography of golden showers! Hijinx!

Probably a waste of time for most people, but for me it was pretty good.

Bava's ERIK THE CONQUEROR

The land of the vikings looks and feels like a natural history diorama. Or as the missus said some rejected set from THE WIZARD OF OZ.

Beside the wildly chaotic battle scenes - with flames and falling and obvious wide shots of stunt doubles - there is some inventive brutality.

The Vikings vote with magically aligning axes that solves nothing, only to decide things with a fight with burning metal. Not to mention the sword dance of Odin's Vestal Virgins that mixed some classical ballet with silly jazz modern. And did I mention the swords.

Near the end, Erik makes a great arrow ladder and a terrible Christian. Not to mention saving the viking maiden so she can burn up on the funeral pyre of her dead husband. GREAT!

Not Bava's best, but it does have some primitive Saturday afternoon appeal.

MONSTER OF LONDON CITY (das Ungeheuer von London City, 1964)

German krimi.

Which means there are some bare ass nakeds briefly jaunting about and the violence is ratcheted up a notch. But only a notch, since even in the black and white shadow world of this movie there is not a hint at a drop of blood. Even though the murders are all Jack the Ripper slash and guts.

Speaking of that, there is a nice anti-censorship, blame the artist hysteria subtext that acts as a cute little distraction - like the foil on a candy kiss.

Drugs, prostitution, Thespians!

Two nice sequences where the Ripper attacks. One where an actress gets dragged along in the dirt, and another chase along a wall that really up plays the shadows and comic book feel.

Great Germanic jazz soundtrack!

This is one of those endless pistol bullet westerns. No one, especially Nero, ever has to reload. I counted 22 shots from one six shooter in one scene.

The movie opens with one of the silliest shootouts ever. Its a chase through an abandoned town. They run this way, end up on the roof, jump down, run away then run back. Then BLAMMO. Its hilarious. But not as funny as how the town comes alive after the bounty killer is routed. The stage coach even arrives!

Nero is not too abused in this one, but he spends the entire movie covered in a three day old sweat. A shiny face that no other actor could pull off as "tough."

The story is really quite silly. And Cisco is really a rather wimpy villain - at one point even throwing a party for the boys who arrived to kill him! But no baddie remains alive or bad very long. Alliances switch with simple shrugged shoulders and a slow stroll away.

Some very fey fist fights undermine the macho. But hardly a woman survives, and there are at least two very sadistic shootings, which is unusually mean-spirited, even for a spaghetti western.

Secret of the Red Orchid (das Rätsel der roten Orchidee) 1962

HOT MOLD!! this is a horrible mess of bad dubbing and wickedly absurd murdering. A clunky, dragfest that attempts to capitalize on gangland chicago and film noir only to borrow the most ham-fisted of both.

First miscast Christopher Lee as the transplanted American in london working with the much less british Adrain Hoven (who could have carried the chi-town g-man swagger a bit more convincingly).

Second, plop two horribly incompentent gangsters into the story - both trying to blackmail english aristocrats with NO SUCCESS - in almost the same way. Klaus Kinski does it with the sex pistols' ransom note cut and paste, while Eric Pohlmann does it with simpleton's block printing. The mystery ends there!

But there are some nice dispatch, inventive murder scenes. Like when the gangsters walk in and machine gun the old Lord Tanner or blow up some random jerk's car.

There is also some tagged on mystery about a supposedly dead gangster, but by the time that spool unwinds I didn't care anymore.

The only good, bright spot is Marissa Mell's lazy eye. Hubba Hubba.

NICK & NORA'S INFINITE PLAYLIST

things i learned watching this movie:

* B&Ters drive everywhere
* Girls always end up with the boys who give them orgasms.

Sweet little movie.

Al Adamson's HELL'S BLOODY DEVILS (1970)

- great credit montage, naked girls, twenty dollar bills and the swastika and star of david!

- bad noir narration, low rent george hamilton hired by the fuller brush sale's man toughs to deal with the new nazi party? Yeah. Um. Okay.

- "I don't like using female agents, especially when they're pretty."

- BOOBS!!

- 15 minutes without bikes or bikers? what sort of biker exploitation flick is this? oh right an adamson one.

- switchblade to the crotch!

- HOLY SHIT!! Colonel Sanders cameo!!
- the best chase car is a station wagon and the best trail car is canary yellow.

- BOOBS!

- at this point I have no idea what is going on. WAIT, the whole thing has been a flash back to this point? That does not make any...fuck it I don't care.

- worst exploding pen device in the history of cinema.

What the heck was that? No bikers. Two topless scenes, and a silly nonsensical international plot of intrigue?

Django il bastardo (aka The Stranger's Gundown)

Revenge killing is almost as ubiquitous as bounty killing in these flicks, huh?

Luciano Rossi (in his sixth Django film!) as the white haired, sickly pale veined Klaus Kinski freekazoid Jack Murdok steals the horrific thunder in this overwrought, plodding revenge epic.

While Anthony Steffen cuts a pretty good poncho box as the anorexic gunfighter, Django (a role he would reprise two more times - including the pure shitfest W Django (aka A Man Called Django), he strains toward the end of the picture under the weight of the fumbled script.

Some truly good things about this movie involve the nasty means of dispatch and the overt sadism shown - particularly whenever Rossi cracks a wide tooth laugh and levels his pistola. Some truly awful things involving refugees, a never-ending set of chases and slasher-esque tropes as Django prances about in the shadows, gunning down or blowing up cowboys.

I enjoyed it, even if there was a stupid subplot of woman and some cash money and the potential life that Django could lead...which I suppose was added to deepen the horror/ghost story/fallen devil motifs of greed and temptation.

Overall, not so shabby Django picture.

Carnimeo's FIND A PLACE TO DIE (Joe... cercati un posto per morire!)

From the opening scene this movie's silliness is the celebrated prime mover of the action. Mrs. Martin is sent into a ruined town full of banditos and other dusty Mexicans to find some men to help her half-buried/crushed husband back at the gold mine! Its a two day ride, so you better get going!

Once there Mrs. Martin meets Joe Collins a disgraced, gun running Confederate drunk played by Capt. Christopher Pike! They put together a ragtag posse of bastards - the giant strongman who keeps a midget as a pet, the quick draw pimp, the defrocked murderous priest, and the friend of Chato gangsta. Who is Chato? Some badman bandito that wants Martin's gold and Collin's guns!

There is a river fistfight, some torturing, a lot of shooting that does not hit anything, some silly double crosses, dynamite, and an ending that had happy couples smiling at each other!

Incredible.

ACE HIGH (Quattro dell'Ave Maria)

Eli Wallach's Cacopoulos is a wronged bandit on the prowl to revenge his 15 years in prison after being double crossed. Who double crossed him? Who cares.

Part chase, part comedy, part caper all mess. Though in the first hour of the film Wallach chews up his softer sadist with some sly grimacing. By the end he is running with the slappy fey wrist that made Tuco such a pervert.

Terrance Hill & Bud Spencer are brilliant as sun baked brutes who are in it to recover their stolen money. Steely glances and taking endless punches to the jaw, these two keep the momentum of the picture snappy. But by this film they already had two NOBODY films together and Hill had perfected a Django stare.

By the time the film lands back in the town of Law And Order, the double crossing cut scenes have grown tiresome. So the casino needs to be robbed. Or something. A high wire acrobatic act lands Hill on the gutter of the casino, an unnecessary overture considering he did that just to open the side door and stand in the street talking to his fellow crooks. HIJINX!

Still, I like Wallach, Hill, and Spencer in this. And there was some really good bits, but more bad ones, I guess.

seriously, the credits took 7 minutes because the film editor's original song was playing behind them. Casio bombipbombip soundtrack. And while the main character, a church going, god fearin bible thumping prude is on the phone with her oversexed friend, the camera is just panning around to focus on various things in her house. The sink, the wall, the fern. Its awesome!

First thing to do when you get that freeky little puppet home? Take a shower. So it can watch. OH! Hello Boobs!

A whole nightmare is depicted and then re-shown as it happens, again, for real, this time. There is 17 minutes I will go get back.

oh no, the devil doll is going to make the bunny watch! That puppet tongue looks hurtful and mean. And the braids? Really? ICK.

I thought that just happened in pornos, where you can be walking down the street with some stolen coats and a sex maniac knocks on her window to call you in for some of the good times. I guess the doll sex turned her into a slut! OH NO. That bunny is going to witness a lot of freakin'!

Now they are proving dancing sucked in the 80s for everyone!

player 2 : "I've been told I have a way with the ladies, but you're not doing anything for my reputation or ego."

She's in love with a puppet! But its not in love with her, nope, it just melted her brains right out of her nose. Dumb.

Arrogant little bunny, with its cymbals.

The whole movie is starting again! OH NO!

Seriously, the worst thing I have ever seen. Mainly for the inept camera work, terrible acting, horrible soundtrack which I think was an auto-setting on a casio keyboard, bad puppeteer, waaaay to sloooow, inaudible dialogue, terrible dancing, and longest opening credits ever. You got to see this. I will email you an attachment if you want.

Blood Sucking Freaks

A sad little S+M snuff comedy, torture porn before there was the mainstream stuff. Horribly acted, horribly filmed, horribly scripted. Tho there were a few redeeming factors:

Dancing hispanic midget in overalls.
A lot of topless women.
The cops are totally creepy.
A cage full of naked cannibals.
A murderous ballet.
A great hammer to the head murder!

But the silliness is overwhelming and the gore is laughable. Some of the set design saves the day, as every thrift store and apartment basement were ultized to full extent. Sardu's black turtleneck screams PERVERT!

avoid.

TO KILL A JACKAL
aka Pray to Kill and Return Alive

The first scene in this one is fantastic. A grub brings a rooster to a pistol fight and ends up with a ricochet bullet sound effect in his gut.

Jackal Ranch, where the action next moves, serves as a tight base of existential angst. A closed room, where the waiting and claustrophobia drive the real speeding dangers posed by the law outside, all the more intense and real. Basically, this is a spaghetti western as imagined by the NO EXIT Sartre.

At least for the first half, where bank robbers are stared down by a no-good, suspicion-wielding stranger, then by a stage coach full of snot-nosed women folk and their rich dandy cuckold.

Kinski is raw and brilliant in these telegraph outpost scenes, flailing about with an eyeliner stare and a rag doll anger. His confidence is dangerous, his doubt murderous. Building his whole character's persona around the handle of a bull whip, which in Kinski's sweaty hand is transformed into another emotive tool.

But once the gold arrives and the bandits take to the land, all the dark shadows and stifled wickedness is burned off in the shine of the cracked sands of the mesas. Silly and a bit incoherent, the movie turns into a race to justice/revenge which was, at best, tacked on by some nervous money investors.

Still. Kinski makes this worth the price of admission and forgives any faults the film has (including terrible transfer). A triple bill of Il Grande Silenzio, Deadlock, and To kill a Jackal would be a triple bill I would pay to see.

Touche pas à la femme blanche (Don't Touch the White Woman) (1974)

stills

A scathing mixed historical retelling of the American genocide and the Battle of Little Big Horn. Leave it to the French to point out that racism in America and manifest destiny all fell neatly between the lily thighs of white women - the title's admonishment is one of the supposed prime movers in Custer's Last Stand.

Much like Cox's WALKER, the timeline and modern tropes (namely the magnetic eyes of President Nixon) that intrude seem to justify the community theater re-enactment and staging. The "surrealism" feels a bit forced and the movie drags on with its few points (American Imperialism is arrogant and stupid, therefore easily defeated) made over and over again before we are rewarded with some gore effects and a very dusty fight.

The cast is great, if under used.
The movie made Noelle sooo made she had to take a bath.

How could this be bad?! Its ghosts fighting monsters! Actors in rubber suits dancing around pretending to punch each other while yelling in Japanese!

Its basically a vampire movie where the creature for the lost ruins of UR inhabits powerful magistrate's bodies so they can feast on the blood of innocents.

All heck breaks loose when the vampire starts targeting countryside children. Especially, after the children flee into the ghost shrine, and implore the weirdos for help. Though I feel that the fat kid in the sumo diaper could have been lost to Japan and the nation would not have suffered that much.

Then the spirit world unites to drive the vampire from the islands of Japan. With much superimposed jumping and rubber appendage flapping. The whole movie works to a simple enough punch line - a stick to the eye!

The core spirits though are a motley group, lead at times by a one legged umbrella that speaks in a near pornographic cacophony of slurps and tongue laps. The long haired, white face scary girl makes an appearance as does what I think is either a huge pile of poop or maybe a penis head with a high pitched voice.

All in all, great fun.

Amazing! Playing with the genre of the spaghetti western, down to making his actors phonetically pre-dub their lines in english, Miike finally makes a movie worthy of his fame.

All the spaghetti western fetishes are present - the absurd costume tweaks - facial piercings! and bowler hats! - to the armor plating, the insane weather (at least three feet of snow falls during the tense last standoff!), the loony and corrupt towns people, the silent gunslinger, the haunted past flashbacks, the gangs, the gold, the women upstairs in garters and corsets! Revenge most foul!

The action is wonderful and the squibs are painful looking. The two rival bosses are equally fey and ridiculous. There is a great intermingling of the rival clan stories - both western and eastern as Shakespeare's histories meets hard boiled samurai tales. There is even a dual image fool, a nod to LoTR's CGI Gollum, poking and dragging around in the form of a disgraced sheriff.

Plus once the coffin arrives, I knew we were seeing the origin of DJANGO! It all makes sense now. The end credits seal the deal.

I can not recommend this movie enough to anyone who has even the faintest appreciation of 60s era Italian westerns. Its a roller coaster ride through the motifs and humor that defined a whole genre of movie!

"Every man has his reasons for wanting to keep on living."

Japanese splatter. Borrowing heavily from ROBOCOP - the shock troop mentality of a corporatized Police force and the repetitious sloganeering and the interspersed fake ads - for its central premise, TGP moves forward in fits and starts, not the sprinkler spray that bathes most of the movie's action.

The story is something about personal, childhood vendettas and a silly genetically modified group of super-killers called Engineers. The Engineers, in true Japanese splatter tradition, grow and morph their organic limbs into mechanized appendages a'la VIDEODROME. Ultimately, the bad guys are bad and the good guys are bad too. Its up to the nylon thigh high clad sword wielding nymphet to slaughter the slaughterers.

The movie is very concerned with the freak show aspect, delving deep into the sexual fetishist applications of severe body transformation. There is a scene in which the ladies are revealed by falling curtain, the final one being a front piece with an overly accurate pee hole. The best perversion in the movie, though, is the amputee the Police Captain keeps on a leash. She hobbled straight out of a Micheal Manning comic! Nice work with the samurai blades too.

But the movie fails, ultimately, because every single idea they had was tossed in. The fist gun is stupid but the rebuff is groaningly idiotic. Plus the flying Police Captain lifted and propelled by the bloody jets of his severed legs is an unsatisfactory resolution. The pitboss needs to go out with undulations and explosions, But much like the last song of a GWAR set, it seems the film makers of TGP ran out of the red dye by the last shot.

I can see the influence of this thing already sinking in...

Godzilla has forced Japan to abandon nuclear and plasma energies and move to solar, wind, and other natural resources. Because Godzilla votes with his feet and tail and firebreath, he wins.

BUT. A special task force has been set up to eliminate the eco-terrorist. How? With a black hole gun. Yep. A gun that shoots a black hole. But the best part is that they G-Graspers are going to satellite that gun into space and called it Dimension Tide - DT for short.

Testing the power of the gun allows the movie to explore two very important themes of the Godzilla canon. First the phenomenon of the shorts-wearing meddling kid. And second, the fact that girls can fight Godzilla, too.

It is probably a singular oddity that the dragonfly-born Megagiurus villian is created by the direct result of the cute, meddling kid. I do not think any other Godzilla movie is so cruelly harsh on the little kid heroes as this one. Finally, simply, dismissing the poor kid to just another fleeing civilian in the thrush of other extras running past a camera.

But that is almost forgivable since the movie finally answers the age old question that has dogged playground conversations for years. Why don't girls like to fight Godzilla? Boys almost always do.

Well, we learn the answer which is that everyone must fight Godzilla. Kinda lame.

The fight between Godzilla and the Megulons and then later the really annoyingly fish wire lined Megagiurus is long and involved and makes a humongous mess of some really cool buildings. Plus Godzilla gets stuck by a stinger twice in the most private and perverse manner. BUT. There are some slapstick reaction shots and an improbable finish to the flying menace.

Still the movie does a few things well - like the puffs of atomic fire that roll from Godzilla's mouth right as he unleashes his deadly breath, or the satellite eve view of Godzilla's crushed city path toward the last plasma generator in Japan.

Overall, okay. At least the human story kinda made sense. I mean even for a Godzilla movie.

A throw back to the Universal monster tropes – wolfman murder mystery solved by the beloved’s silver dagger. The townspeople even grab pitchforks and storm the castle! Great stuff.

Cursed by the zip up leotard Satan (who likes it doggy style, ladies), Naschy eats it in this one. Something about gypsies and the bite of the Devil’s teeth. The wolfman suit is hilarious and the special effects are brilliant in their ineptitude – especially the super speed attacks! The cleavage never bubbles like a Hammer House, but we do get some full frontal nudity, at least twice in the movie!

But the subtext is even better. All the urbane, wealthy, educated characters who exist in the civilized society are devoured by the beast of hell. The lower class servants are murdered in cold, cold blood by the mossy teeth villagers who deal their mob justice with pitchforks and torches. The old ways must be respected and feared.

Irregardlessly, by the time the cop starts throwing rocks at the werewolf, the movie had won my heart!

Opening with a failed abortion and ending with an attempt at anal sex, this movie never lets up. From the sex doll rapist in the tightie whiteys to the incestuous relationship of the killer to her sister, STRIP NUDE delivers the goods. The dubbing is hilarious since it really adds to the absurdity of plot line.

The police in this one are as lecherous as they are totally bumbling, lazy and incompetent.

Even if the blood is a trickle, the noodz are plenty and long standing, idling even, as the actresses fumble in brightly lit rooms or are choked by their lovers. Misogynist even for Italians.

Oh and Edwige Fenech! Let me put crippled babies in you. Yowzah.